Focus like a laser on what really matters, learn how to actually get yourself to do it so you can accomplish your goals.
One day my little boy was having a hard day, and I lost my cool and yelled at him when I shouldn’t have. He’d been coping as well as could be expected for a 2 year-old (he was also sick that day), and I felt awful. I didn’t particularly like myself at that moment and decided to become more patient. If I got angry it would be because I CHOSE to become angry, and not a knee-jerk reaction.
I forgot about it for awhile, and then one day I ran across a technique to help people stop complaining. I wondered if it might work for patience too. It did. In fact I think it could work for almost anything, so I’m creating this page to spread the idea.
It sounds a bit “out there”, but changing the way you think inside can make a big difference to your overall happiness. With few exceptions, whether or not your happy is based on INTERNAL factors. (Studies have shown that because people are constantly adjusting to their circumstances and peer-group, external things don’t bring lasting happiness.)
If one of these sentences sound true, we’re on the same page:
If I was more patient, I would be happier.
If I worried less about things I can’t control, I would be happier.
If I stopped thinking negative thoughts about myself, I would be happier.
This technique works well. I’ve been doing it myself to become more patient, especially with my kids. It doesn’t work instantly, and of course everyone’s timeline varies because we’re all different. But if you try, this will work.
1. You wear a wristband. When you catch yourself thinking or doing the behavior you’ve decided to change, change the wristband to the other wrist.
2. Keep track of how many days you can keep the wristband on one wrist. If you can get to 21 days straight, you’re done.
The rules: When you catch yourself, no need to snap it against your wrist or give yourself a talking-to. Just move it to the other wrist. No drama required. The change in your thoughts/behavior happens indirectly. All you’re trying to do here is become AWARE of your thoughts/actions.
Results: When you start, you’ll find yourself switching wrists a lot. It could be many many times in one day. Don’t sweat it. It will improve, and the stretches without a switch will get longer. Most changes you make in life aren’t so easy to measure, enjoy the process!
